I'm BACK! Ta-Dai-Ma

OMG...I haven't been writing a blog for ages! And, to be honest, I've just remembered that I have a blog after a friend of mine told me to read his blog!

Well, something has been pondering in my mind.

I was talking to my best buddy on msn yesterday and as usual we gossip about anything. And then, I told him about the fight I had with my bf.

The story goes like this. On sunday after church, I took a train to the city and reached my bf's friend's house tired. So as usual, I asked him where he parked the car (I borrowed him my car so that they can buy whatever they need for the small party at night!). He told me that he parked it in the carpark in Chinatown (which would took us 10 mins to walk there!). So madly ('cos I was tired and frustrated) I told him off as saying that he should have parked on the street which would be cheaper! He just told me he didnt thought of it. Fine, I thought, doesn't want to make a BIG deal about it as I just want to enjoy the takoyaki party. The night went well and all of us enjoyed the party very much! As the good times passed, it's time for us to head home. He offered to pick up the car himself while all of us waiting in the apartment. After about 15 mins, he called and told me that the carpark was closed and we have to pick the car up tomorrow. It was like a thunder that strike into my head. I was furious but not showing it to everyone else as I didn't want to spoiled the atmosphere! When he was back, there were a total ignorance between us. Well basically, it's me that giving the ignorance. But then again, it would be better for me to ignore than to shout at him in front of everyone! However, he took it differently.

Well, to cut it short, the night didn't end very well. Because he was depressed and I was too tired to talk about it (I took some alcohol). When I was on the bed about to sleep, he just spoke out of no where. He told me that when he was young, he don't have many friends. In fact, no friends. The total ignorance from everyone makes him feels like committing suicide. At that moment, I felt so sorry. But nothing came out of my mouth to comfort him. I just didn't know what to say. Anyway, I promised him that we will talk about it tomorrow as I was really tired and couldn't really think at that moment.

Well, after telling my best buddy about this story. All he can say is weird. I was like WTF? That's not what I expected. So I asked why. He just told me that this is really stupid and this is no big deal. He just told me that "you guys just fight about random stupid things!" I was like, does this sounds stupid to you? Because I really don't think this is stupid!

After a night of thought and looking back at what had happened, I still don't think that THAT's a STUPID fight as we fought about that for 2 days. It's just that I don't have to make it that BAD for us to fight for 2 days.

Well, talking to friends is always good as they'll tell you truth and look at things from outside. I think I should really hold my temper. Hah!

Sydney! Here I am!!!

Just came back 2 days ago. Landed in Sydney at about 8am. To be honest, it's one of the worst flight ever! Flew off from Kuala Lumpur at about 915pm (M'sia time), n had "dinner" at about 11pm! Gosh, can you imagine!? And then, when I wanted to get some sleep, those people around me were talking so loudly! Man, I just wanted some peace! That's not the end. We had our breakfast at 330am in the morning (630am sydney time). This is sooo bad to my biorhythm!

Anyway, reached home at about 10am. got myself some sleep till 230pm i think. Got online, unpacked my luggage, cleaned the house (especially the kitchen) etc etc...and there, my gay friends called! What's the event of the night? Hot Pot in Ashfield! Wow, nice one! Can't wait to be there as I've not eaten anything after the flight! Besides, I don't have to drive! Yeah!

Basically, the night did not ended at dinner! As usual, the activities go on and on till everyone is "down". After the Hot and Spicy dinner, we continue our dessert session in Passion Flower @ Darling Harbour. Bare in mind that it was quite an unusual windy night, considering that Australia is having their summer now. So, it was quite an experience eating ice-cream when non of us have any jacket with us.

So how can we warm ourselves up? Next stop, Shark's Hotel. It's time for some reviews. =) This place is quite a nice place for some chillin' out, some drinking session, and also some pool session. Oh I forgot the most important thing of the night! It was actually Kenny's birthday! So, he has to drink one shot with each of us, which means he has to drink 8 shots! Unfortunately, that idiot puke it all out after the 8th shots and wasted our money on him! So the morale of the story is, don't force a person to drink 8 shots in a row, let him/her finish it in an hour would be great.

That's not the end of the night! We went to GreenBox for another Karaoke session! Justin C. suggested this as he claims that he could actually SING when he is "high"! Well, here we go! Stayed there for another two hours! Enjoyed it very much as I really miss them! To be honest, they are my best buddies in Sydney even thought they are pretty gay... =)

Thanks guys for all the memories! I feel blessed.

Too nice? or Too Naive?

This is some of my thoughts i wrote a few months ago...

Questions have been pondering in my mind. There are too many people (especially this week) telling me that I'm too being too nice! One of my dillemas is, is this a personality/charater that I should maintain? or i should just stop being stupid and naive.

Let's see. The people who told me this are ranged from normal friends to best friend. Well, for the hang out/normal friends, I could probably explain it. Generally, people wouldn't show their true self in front of everyone. Only those close ones would get to see my true self as they spent more time hanging out with me, listen to all my bullshit, and also be with me during bad times! These are the friends that I would not mind showing them the worst in me. But on second thought, I never mind about showing people the "bad/stupid/blur" side of me.

Well, there is this random friend of mine who told me, 'Grace, you are such a nice girl'. Alright, any girl who come across this sentense, would know that that's a normal pick up line of guys. So, I didn't really pay much attention into it. Then, this friend of mine who knows a little bit more about me, told me that I'm being too nice sometimes. But I was thinking to myself, isn't that what people normally do? Well, maybe he is right! Sometimes, I'm just being too nice till I forgotten about protecting myself at the same time. Ok, I'll accept that advice and try to be careful.

Best Dessert Ever!

Woke up at about 10am this morning. Have absolute no idea why was I waking up so early! Just for your information, I did NOT set the alarm clock today! I wanted to sleep till noon! But why? Why? Why can't you let me sleep till noon?!? Oh well, I suppose it's a habit. I've been waking up at 8am since God knows when...dammit.

Oh...I had this weird dream before i got up. I think me and my friends were in this place call Double Bay, near Stamford Plaza (Hotel where I organized the Malaysian Ball, but why there?!?). And out of the blue, two of them just wanted to have some drifting! You can imagine how crazy it is to drift around Double Bay, which is the upper class suburb in Sydney! But the point is, no one was there to stop them! oh well, it was just a dream...

Let's go back to what I did yesterday. Oh, hmmm, now that I remembered, I actually had a havoc day. Let's not talk about those day time 'incidence'. Let's talk about night time! This is the highlight of my friday!!! David and myself went to this jazz restaurant call Soup Plus (you can see the entrance picture below this blog). This is an awesome place! And this is the second time I went there! When we reached there, they told us that they have some special package thingy for $30, including 2 course meal and door charge! I was like, what?! Didnt's David said that they told him it's $13 when he booked the table through phone? ANYWAYZ, this is lesson for us to listen properly on what people said on the phone. But I think $30 is reasonable coz we will end up ordering food for about that price, so it alright. When we got up to table 18, where our seats were located, there were people sitting there! So we thought we might have to squeeze with that couple as that table could fit 4 people. Nevermind I thought, squeezing is fine for me. David then went to enquire about the seat sharing thingy. Gosh, they were so rude! Especially the lady! I should call her the bloody woman! She was just giving us this disgusted look saying that, NO, I did not tell them that I wanted to share this table! Gosh! I just felt like slapping her face till no one could recognised her! We were just being nice and ask you before we sit down, you don't have to give us this look as if you are the upper class people and we are some street beggers!!! Let's not let this couple spoil our mood, I told myself. The manager got us a place at the very corner of the place, which I think it's a better seat where it's cosy and not too close to the stage too!

Got ourselves a set of entree with main meal and a set of main meal with dessert. As you can see, the name of this restaurant/pub is Soup Plus, you can basically guess that the famous dish is obviously the soup. You can pay the $5 door charge and order a soup with garlic bread, that'll make you full! But that will only be available on Monday till Thursday while Friday and Saturday is $30, which includes a two course meal. Anyway, we didn't order the soup. Instead, we got ourselves the crepe, Veal Saltimbocca, Grilled Barramundi and the ultimate dessert (which will be mention later). The food was great at that price and the band is superb! They had Continental Blues Party yesterday night with soul, blues and down-home funk! Great band with the lead singer who plays the harmonica, keyboardist, guitarist, bassist and drummer. They had 3 jamming session from 8pm till midnight and we were sitting there the whole night eating, chatting, and relaxing in the music.

We had our 'Ultimate Dessert' during the third session of music jamming. Why do I say that it's ULTIMATE? Because this heavenly dessert is a cake made out of a layer of white chocalate fudge, a layer of dark chocalate fudge, and a layer of cheese cake! Seriously, I never thought that it would be that great as it looks really normal and not eye catchy when David brought it over to the table ( we have to take it ourselves at the counter). But when I tried my first bite, I almost melted there! It was AWESOME!!! Besides, the band was playing some blues music at that moment!!! OMG, that was just one of the best moment in my life! And I thought this ultimate heavenly moment is definitely worth sharing in this blog!!! Unfortunately, both of us did not bring any camera! Oh well, it doesnt matter, I've got it in my permanent memory. Anyone who are so happen to be in Sydney got to go Soup Plus! It's a double tumbs up for this. Just for your information, they are going to move to 1 Margaret St (corner of Clerence St), City. So if you still want to grab a chance to have a feel of this underground and 'almost collapse' building, with live jazz music and food, go NOW!!! I suppose this week is the last week for them to have it in this current place, 383 George St, Sydney.

Grab your chance now!

If you like jazz, blues, latin, funk or swing, then Soup Plus is the place for you. 

AJ's Birthday Bash

I've haven't been blogging since...god knows when...probably 2 weeks ago? Anywayz, its time for me to spend some time in blogging now. Let's have some reminiscence on last week!

Had to hand in 2 assignments last week and I only spend less than 24 hours on each assignment! crazy shitz! After handing in those bullcrap, went to BLURnda's house for a home cook meal! I would say that it was the best meal in the week as I have not tasted any Malaysian style home cook food in a while (not that my mum cooks often). Had a great time there and we girls spent a LONG time in preparing to go to AJ's birthday bash. I felt so under-dress after seeing all of them spent like 2 hours in choosing what to wear + make up + choosing shoes to match. Gosh!

Went to meet AJ and all in front of GreenBox. Whoa, I didn't expect him to invite so many people to his Karaoke session! Most of them are AJ's friends from high school (of course there are some Malaysian Club's committee)! At that moment, I felt so old! Anywayz, it seems like we were having our own "little party + pub + concert". Had a 2 hours karaoke session with all the "noise pollution" and not to forget, our crazy drinking session! Also, not to mention that we jump from pub to pub! All you guys can see how crazy we are in the pictures below!

ENJOY!

the bday boy with all the HOT CHICZ!!! 

me n jo with some guys...i really forgot their names...sorry dude! 

all the drunkens!!! 

AJ's "trying to be cool" face, but look at his face! he looks gone! 

AJ with the guys! 

Being Twenty-Something

They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis." Have a read. Have a think.

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now. You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones.

What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't.

One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic.

You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

Let your twenty something friends read this as well. Maybe it will help someone feel like they aren't alone in their state of confusion...

Hallucinate

Watching Australian Live Verdict now. Been bludging for the whole day, and I still enjoy myself now by watching TV! But on the other hand, the evil side of me tells me that Monday is the only night with all the good shows! With Queer Eye For the Straight Guy and Sex and the City coming up. And of course, not to forget OC on Tuesday!

Anyway, just came back from dinner in Shalom and got some bubble tea from Tea Inn. And guess who I saw there?! I saw Sonia! Well, I only saw Kristy at first and turn away after saying hi to her; but Sonia shouted my name after that! I was surprise to see her and vice versa! We came to a conclusion that its the BOOBIES Force that draw us together! LOL!!! Anyway, meeting her has brought me back to last week.

Last Friday, I went to SUAMS's Deepavali Night with all the other guys and had some home cooked food by the SUAMS committee members. That event had a pretty good turn up and there wasn't enough food for everyone's second round! The atmosphere was great until it started to rain and everyone just had to run into the nearest building for shelter. However, it didn't spoil everyone's mood for the night as some were still chatting away in there when I left at about 10pm.

I went over to Chek's and Sern's house for the Hallucination Session. Was waiting for a while before everyone was there. To tell you the truth, I was really nervous. I've never had a ciggy in my life and I gave my first smoke to weed! I was afraid that I would make such a big mess in front of all the expert there! Anyway, Sern me showed me how to smoke through the bong (not too sure if it's the correct term or spelling) thingy and I was like a small kid or student who was trying really hard to absorb knowledge and remember procedures at the same time! I was told that I had to breathe in as hard as possible when they burn the weed and hold it in my lung for the longest possible time. But it turned out that I was coughing really badly after smoking in all the weed as I was out of breath! It was so embarrassing as all the weed just fall all over my pants and on the floor as well! However, they told me that it was good to cough as the lung will absorb the weed quicker! Well, it make sense and I don't think they were trying to make me feel better! Half an hour later, everyone was pretty high and felt the effect, except me! So I thought I didn't had enough and decided to have another go. This time, I got the hang of it and it went really smooth. I had three smokes on the second round and it just went perfectly! I was pretty proud of myself that I got it right on the second time! Yeah!

Anyway, all of them were starting to get really crappy. I was trying to tell Chek that my brain felt really spicy which I don't know why. And he started to ask me all those funny question like, "spicy as is chili spicy? What chili? Is it red chili or green chili? Or was it sweet chili"! It was funny because he was trying to confuse me but I wasn't as high as they were! All I felt was really sleepy and stone. I just wanted to sleep! But NO, they just kept on waking me up and told me not to waste the weed. Oh yea, I forgot to mention that Sern gave us a really good performance on his trance dancing and lighting thingy. It was really cool as the whole room was dark with only two dots of light in his hand! He gave us a really good visual illusion. After that, we were just chilling in their room and listening to the music. There is this one moment where I know that the weed had an effect on me: Sern was asking me that whether I was from Jinjang and I was like yea (in a sarcastic manner as they've always laugh on where I live). He then asked me to go over to his side and look out of his balcony. OH MY GOSH!!! I couldn't believe what I saw!!! I saw Jinjang! The place where I was born, the place where I was brought up, and the place I have been living for the past 21 years!!! That was freaking me out!!! I was shouting all the way while all of them were laughing! I knew that was embarrassing but at that moment I didn't care anymore; they could laugh all they want! Anyway, our Hallucinating Session continued with lots of food and comedy. We were eating and watching some movies or funny entertainment shows all night. According to them, I was supposed to feel that the food was extra delicious and the comedy was extra funny when I had weed; but I felt like I was a total pig. Nevermind about that as long as it is not addictive, I was thinking to myself.

Stayed over at their house and woke up at 8 something in the morning because I was really hot as I was sleeping in my jeans! Got out of their house on tip toe and went for my appointment with the beauty salon at 945am. After that, Brenda's surprise party at noon. The full description of Brenda's surprise thingy can be seen in Wei's blog. Had a fun day even though I was super tired by the time I go to bed and I still have to wake up at 8am the next day. Bleh!

What a weekend!

Committee Dinner 2004!

These few picz are the committee dinner picz taken in Star City. As usual, all of us took plates and plates of prawns! However, there are always some exceptions! Check the pictures out! Wei just lovesss sausages, doesn't he?

Anywayz, enjoy the picz as the last two proves that WEI LOVES D**K!!! Cheers!

MSO committee 2004!!! 

Wei juz love the "sausages" doesnt he? Thats why he got the WL4 Award!!! 

Check this out! WL4 is in action! 

Karaoke

These are some of the picz we took on our karaoke session last Friday! It was really fun! We sang from 12am till 4am!!! Gosh! We actually cheated on the timing thingy... =P

The story goes like this. We went in at about 1215 am as they took 15 mins to get rid of the customer before us and also clean up the room. Besides, we booked for 2 hours with 8 people, but I think we had more than 15 people cramp inside the room! some of us have to sit on each other's lap while others hv to stand...poor thing... After that, we added another hour as all of us didn't feel satisfied with the "2 hour ONLY". And it went on till 315am. We were expecting someone to page our room to shoo us away but no, they didn't do anything until 345am! They just freeze our tv so that we couldn't sing anymore, ops!

Reached home at about 430am. I could see that the sun was going to rise anytime soon. I felt better because I actually saw the sun rising last last friday when I drove home at around 5 something in the morning. Anywayz, looking forward for tonight hanging out session. What time will I be coming back home?

Sonia was trying to be cute? nah, she is cute! while Louise is scandalizing on the phone...=P 

our Karaoke king, Aaron and Jay! while kenny was falling asleep... 

sonia, jo, AJ n Wei...jo looking blur... 

Singing in Green Box... 

This is a photo shot of prez n vice prez of mso 2004 and 2005: Aaron, Wei, AJ and me. 

Negotiation

I had such a stress morning. Was wide awake at about 7 something in the morning due to my forgetful nature: I forgot to close the window; Result: my ears have to suffer the noise pollution since 6 something in the morning as my apartment is located near the main road. I lazed around until my alarm clock rang, which is 8am. However, due to the procrastinating nature, I snooze till around 8 something. After all the 'daily washing', I had a traditional breakfast (coffee with arnott's biscuits for dipping, love that!).

Alright, cut all the crap. I reached uni at about 930am when the class was suppose to be 10am. Well, I thought my groupmate had received my SMS for her yesterday saying that I wouldn't be going to the meeting yesterday but to have a quick one this morning. Weirdly, she didn't receive. Oh well, nevermind about that. Unexpectedly, I managed to do some preparation and some figure calculation in that half and hour! That is why I always think that morning is a better time to study, or do whatever work that requires the brain.

Anyway, the whole negotiation went on for 3 freaking hours. The whole situation were pretty tense throughout the whole negotiation, especially at the beginning. There is always one hot tempered person in every group; and in my group, that will be Cecilia. As for the other group, that girl was even 'HOT' than her! Me and the others fall into the position as the fire bridged and have to save the fire before they could burn down the building! The whole negotiation were less tense on the 3rd hour as all of us are pretty tired and just felt like getting this over and done with! At the same time, both sides were making a lot of concession just to reach an agreement.

After some lunch and rest at home, I went back to the uni to observe another negotiation! This negotiation was so dramatic! During the whole negotiation, the Teacher's Association representatives was having so many dramatic phone calls saying that all the teachers were calling in to on their progress and they felt really pressured on this matter, etc. etc... Besides, hey have also threaten the Board's representative that they will go on strike if they don't reach an agreement and all the media and teachers were waiting outside to wait for their results! This is such a Big Whoo Haa!!! They have apply the tactics they learned in the lectures! However, the board's representative stay firm on their ground and never move a single bit. They were so calm in battling with the teacher's aggressiveness and dramas! During the last 30 minutes (they have only negotiated for 2 hours), the teachers have no choice but to offer a package to the board to agree on as they are running out of time. In that half an hour, they have spend their time looking into the package and clearly, the teachers have made quite a big concession on that. Just like us, they have ended where they just want to get it over and done with!

After observing their negotiation, I felt that I was so soft during my negotiation with the teachers as I kept on thinking that I am on the less fortunate side. But as I've describe before, I could have done better by standing really firm on my ground as I should have thought that teachers would also want to reach an agreement as they would not want to loose their job! I shouldn't have given in so much as they took advantage of us step by step! All these has made me think further on my future. Do I have to work in this cruel world? If you watched the Apprentice yesterday night, you would know what am I talking about. Mr. Trump just fire the guy who volunteer himself in the board room as he thought that he would definitely not be the one who get fired. Unfortunately, Mr. Trump did not think that way! He thought that that was a stupid decision as it would caused his company to fall if he use it in reality! Trump was right in some sense, but that guy just sacrifice himself just to avoid the other from getting into the board room and get fired! Has the world forgotten to see the good side of him? Has the world forgotten how to appreciate people's sacrifices? Has the world forgotten how to be grateful? All these have once again reminded me that I have to be part of it. I have deal with it and deal with it! Just like my negotiation, I ought to be more firm on my ground as I would get a lower mark in my negotiation report if the lecturers think I am the weaker ones! And I do not want that! Besides, I've contributed in helping the other team to score a higher mark than me! I do not want that as well!

Anyway, all these have pull me back from my ideal world. I've always known that this world is cruel; but on the other side of me tells me that there are still some good side in this world. Now, I doubt about it. What is the ratio of good and bad in this world? Is the percentage of the good side so low that you can barely notice it or there are still noticeable? I'm not so sure about the answer now.

Dilemma

Jonathan had his graduation ceremony yesterday. I have to sneak out of the lecture to attend the picture session after his graduation ceremony. Well, I was suppose to go on Monday during the afternoon with all the others but it was raining really heavily + I couldn't find any parking + I have no umbrella (lost it again!).

Anyway, I was running all the way up to the upper campus and I saw so many graduates along the way! To tell you the truth, I'll get really excited when I see the graduates with all their graduate gowns with the hat thingy. I've always imagined how my graduation would be or how would I look like if I am wearing that gown thingy since the first time I see graduates in uni, which was 4 years ago. I've always feel that that is such a long way for me to go! But on the other hand, I would tell myself that time passes in the blink of an eye, my turn will come very soon (which is true, coz this is my last semester!).

That was just some few minutes thoughts when I was walking to the Clancy Auditorium. When I saw Jonathan, I was really excited and happy for him! He looked so good in the graduation gown! And so were the others! All of them just looked so intellectual in that gown!

After that, we started hunting for nice scenery to take picture! We started it out by taking pictures in front of Clancy Auditorium and the library lawn. I must admit that even though UNSW has a relatively small compound compare to UniSyd and MacQUni, it has quite some 'photogenic' sceneries. Especially when we get to this spot where you can overlook the Quadrangle, that is an awesome view! Oh yea, I forgot to mentioned that we met yees (my housemate) along the way, and she took a shot of that view with Jonathan. Shortly after that, we went to uni main walk way and Computer Science building to take some memorable shots. That concludes my picture session with Jonathan as I still have to rush for another lecture!

Alright, you must be thinking that why is my blog has nothing to do with the title I put? Well, the dilemma I had from this is the confusion of whether to graduate or not. I'm sure most of the students would have some similar dilemma as me. I'm dying to get out of this studying shitz as I've been studying for the past 15 years! But on the other hand, I don't want to work! I still want to enjoy my life, bludge at home, watch Oprah when im free during 2pm-3pm, watch queer eye on Monday, watch OC on Tuesday, clubbing on Thursday occasionally as I don't have to wake up early for work the next day...etc, etc. At the same time, I guess I'm just had some fear of facing the corporate world. I've always heard a lot of stories of backstabbing, betraying, bitching behind the back, setting trap etc, etc in the working world! However, this is part of my growing up process! It's not that I have never experience these kind of ugly scenario! Anyway, I concluded that I'm just plain lazy, end of discussion.

And now, I'm just sitting here blogging, chatting online and doing nothing (I'm really tired coz I'm lack of sleep but i know it's juz some lame excuses!). Did I mention that I just cancelled my group meeting at 5pm? Gosh!